Train Daze

Beside my window, while the train swayed me and tempted me to shut my eye-lids, I saw the picture of our current reality as a human community flash before me as if I were watching a silent film. It was humbling and deeply heart-breaking. One moment, what appeared before me was an oasis where I could see the sand and shore and pristine million dollar homes, the next moment, walls covered in graffiti and the depressing outcome of our consumer culture and our vast socioeconomic divide.

My heart felt a deep sadness when I looked upon the effects of our disregard for the earth. As I moved along through the tracks of my train, I saw the direct outcome of what it means to use and consume without consciousness. Some areas were untouched and preserved by either nature conservationists or people with privilege, and other areas were clearly impoverished and depleted of natural beauty.

I have lived in, worked in and gone to school in places where the poor remained just outside of my vision. I was born into a white,upper-middle class family and all I have known is a life full of grace, beauty and love. I have always had everything I could ever need or want. I am always taken care of and I have a community of people who have blessed me with their guidance and assistance my whole life. If I fall, I will not fall very far, because I have been given this incredibly beautiful gift of just being who I am. I am not discriminated against by my race, my age nor my sexuality.

I see how I am privileged. I see how I did nothing to deserve this. I am overwhelmed by it. And seeing this is only a beautiful, deep reminder for me to look at what I have and see how I have often times unknowingly separated my self from the whole.

I am part of an even bigger community; the global community. I see my neighbors and my fellow humans in their suffering and it breaks me at a very core level. I don't want to continue serving separation. I want to embrace the whole. I am so fortunate it brings me to tears. I can only begin to change my outlook, put my money where my mouth is, support politicians and people in power who can begin to remove the veil of separation and always move forward with love and compassion for the larger human community.

Watching the visuals pass by my window on the train was a clear reminder to me to understand where I came from, and to lovingly change where I am going.